"In It" Part 2

More about what it feels like to navigate murkiness.

I write this from the murk.

And I want to be clear that being “in it” feels messy and really inconsistent. 

Midjourney prompt: /imagine an image of a murky pond with thick algae covering its surface so that you can't see the bottom

As I write about my experiences moving through life, and my current transition in particular, I aim to present my thoughts in a way that feels organized and thought provoking. 

I am not pretending to have all of the answers, nor am I implying that I live by this wisdom easily everyday. 

The truth is, I relearn how to work through situations I have been through before

all.
the.
time.

I have to remember to apply the advice I share with my kids, the things I learned from my dog and get a firm grasp on that enlightening thought I had just a few days (or hours) ago. 

Sometimes the wisdom is sticky.

Other times it flies away.

But I believe that there is ultimately a cumulative effect to continually revisiting and applying ideas. 

This Brené Brown quote is one of my favorites:

“I’m not here to be right, I am here to get it right.” 

Getting it right means falling down along the way and sometimes stumbling on that same stubborn rock more than once (or twice). But you keep getting up and traveling the path again and again. 

I often wonder this about authors, writers, speakers and others whose perspective I admire. They share such wisdom, but do they struggle too? I think the answer is a profound yes, which is why they can write about things in ways that resonate so deeply. 

For me, it feels like this:

Some days I wake up and the pond is crystal clear. I can see all of the pebbles at the bottom and know just the ones I am aiming for. I can dive in and collect them with relative ease. But other days, the pond is a total mess - filled with a murk so thick and gross that I don’t want to dip a toe in to feel for the rocks I might need to collect. (How did that happen overnight?!) On those icky pond days, I need to start by skimming the muck before I can even start to see the bottom and feel like jumping in.

Midjourney prompt: /imagine a crystal clear mountain pond where you can see rocks at the bottom.

And I usually can’t do this alone…

a supportive hug from my husband
a reminder from a friend that I am not alone
an email from someone who read my last post encouraging me to keep writing

…can usually get me going. 

So if you wake up to the murk, know that you aren’t the only one, that you have support and there will be days when the pond is clear. We can celebrate those together.