Sagebrush & Bison
Thoughts on teams and our desire to belong - Part 2
During a bike race this past weekend, a herd of bison spurred me on.
Let me explain…
The power of metaphor:
I rely on images and metaphors to make sense of life’s most intense and complicated moments. It helps me get out of my head to conceptualize something I can wrap my mind around. It also helps me articulate my emotions in a way others will (hopefully) understand.
With my kids I talk about opening the lids on boxes to give people a chance to be something different, I suggest conjuring images of venting volcanoes before blowing the top of your own personal volcano, and I ask them to imagine pulling a domino out of a lined up stack as an opportunity to pause before making another questionable decision.
These images often give me perspective on something that is feeling a bit too intense physically or emotionally. By giving myself just a bit of separation, I can better understand what’s going on and regulate my response.
The symbol of the sagebrush
This week, I was climbing a mountain on my bike. It was the only timed section of a race, and I wanted to do well. I like climbing, but if I think about it too much in the moment, I start to worry, fret and over-analyze. I am best if I can just let go and allow my body to do its best. So, part way through the 4.5mi effort, I thought about the fact that, for the first time in a race, I was wearing the jersey of a team.
I’ve been participating in gravel bike races for the past four years, each year having a bit more fun, each year feeling a bit more confident and each year improving my position in the overall standings. After a solid race earlier this year, I pondered getting more disciplined about my training. I am not getting any younger, and what would it look like to train again for the next several years? (I have a long history of training as a distance runner, but have dedicated the past 15 years to more casual exercise, instead focusing on being “mom” and on my career).
So I reached out to my cycling friend. Her mom is the founder of a women’s cycling club called “Artemisia.” I felt the need to ride for a more than myself, so I explained my situation and asked if there might be a place for me. She said, “Yes!” Instantly, I felt like I belonged to a community. Regardless of the fact that I don’t know most of the women on the team, I was part of them.
The club is called artemisia for a reason. The name is derived from the Latin name of the big sagebrush, Artesmia tridentata, the ubiquitous plant that dominates southwestern landscapes. As a keystone species, the sagebrush offers food, shelter and stability to the surrounding ecosystem, allowing it to thrive. Just like the sagebrush, women are uniting, healing forces within their communities.
…We firmly believe that creating a cycling program focused on women’s health, wellness, inclusivity, education, and fun will ultimately lead to a community of women that are empowered to make a difference in all their circles of influence…
I am proud to be part of this mission and honored to wear a jersey that represents women who care about healing, unity and nourishment. After 20 years of living in Utah, I no longer drive across miles of open sagebrush desert and feel that it is mundane or barren. Instead, it has become a familiar, welcomed and comforting site - part of a mountain/desert ecosystem I love and call home. This team is part of that.
The Bison
As I raced this weekend, I thought of the sagebrush. I thought of its strength, and for some reason (maybe it was because I had recently spent several weeks exploring bison country), an image of the stalwart bison came to mind, an animal that thrives amongst the sagebrush. This image took root, and as I climbed, pedal stroke after pedal stroke, it flourished. I imagined all of the women who also wear this jersey as a herd of bison surrounding me. Together we were a group moving up and around each switch-backing turn. Their strength and power was my strength and power. I wasn’t thinking about my breathing or the fact that it was hard. I wasn’t thinking about how much climbing I had left or if I could do it. I just thought of myself among the bison - my herd.
Strange and a little “out there?” Maybe, but it worked! Knowing that I was part of something bigger gave me the courage, the confidence to persevere.
Teams
Since college, I haven’t been part of a team in this way. Perhaps it’s the changing of the seasons that has my subconscious feeling nostalgic, primed to conjure images and feelings of such camaraderie. The cool mornings and changing leaves of fall, the warm afternoons and shorter days will forever take me back to my cross country years and the reunion with my teammates. That team will always be part of me, and now I have a new team, a new group of women, a new name to wear across my chest that serves this role in my present.
Being part of this team isn’t about competing, winning or outperforming others. It’s about community, support, growth and belonging. And the symbol this team uses to define its values, the big sagebrush, serves as a powerful metaphor for how I can approach riding. Despite its nature as an individual pursuit, surrounding myself with a community provides strength, courage and purpose.
Perhaps next time you drive past miles of sagebrush, you’ll appreciate the humble plant in a new way, as a strong and connecting player in our desert ecosystem and a symbol of strength and resolve. Maybe you’ll even picture (or see) a herd of bison.
I’m curious…what images and metaphors help you navigate your place in the world, allow you to separate from the intensity of the moment or gain perspective and keep going?
Kristi~ You are an amazing person and your story is incredibly inspiring. Thank you for sharing and keep them coming. Also, CONGRATULATIONS on your new team and your recent race accomplishment. Woot Woot!!